Welcome to another long overdue blog! I think I promised this last week, so THANK YOU for your patience! This blog is going to be all about what I’ve been up to recently and it’ll contain quite a lot of my honest thoughts and feelings, so if you’re easily offended or if you are just searching the web for happy puppy pics, please look elsewhere, or read this, and succumb to my wine fuelled world of ranty honesty. *Disclaimer, can’t promise more enjoyment that looking at puppies.
Here I am again, with a cuppa (red paisley mug today!), a blog theme tune (Alkaline Trio – From here to infirmary) and a terrible outfit (a jumper I’ve had for about 6 years that looks like it’s been attacked by a pack of angry rats and some leopard print slippers a work colleague gave me that are about 3 sizes too big).
The reason I’m writing to you today is that, as well as my “normal” job/jobs, I’ve been doing a hell of a lot of Media work recently, and I was very kindly and luckily invited to join some amazing and talented people at an evening at the BBC.
The evening was SO overwhelming, but brilliant and I was absolutely honoured to be there. I am so happy and grateful (#blessed) for the attention that I’ve been receiving from the industry recently. HOWEVER, I cannot help but feel mixed emotions about it all.
The reason for these emotions were brought on by the question I was asked all evening, almost repeatedly “Why do you want to be in the Media industry?”. I struggled to answer this on the evening. I mean, Why do you WANT to be…anything?
I have a huge passion inside me and when I have a dream or a target, I chase it and take no prisoners. So, why did I feel like this was the wrong answer?
So.. quite plain, and quite simply, after much deliberation, here are my reasons for wanting to pursue a media “career”…
1. I know I can – I have a huge self belief, and even when I attack myself mentally it only makes me STRONGER. Like “they” say, you are your own biggest critic. If I know I am the best person for a role, I will go for it without question. Quite often because I don’t like receiving compliments I’m quite quick to deflect them however, this is no true reflection of my self worth. Stick me in front of a camera, ask me to do a job and it will be done… and it will be done well.
2. I want to portray a positive image – I don’t want to be an idol or a role model, however I do want to create a fair and positive image. As a disabled person growing up, there was NO ONE for me to look AT, let alone look up to. Now, the goal posts have changed! Companies/The Media Industry are looking for disabled people to hit targets, which is fantastic! However! Is it fair?! I do not take satisfaction in getting “given” a job because they need someone. I want to win a job fair and square, I want to be the best PERSON for the role, not the best DISABLED PERSON. I long for the day that I can audition and be offered roles because of my suitability for them, not just because of my impairment. I am not a box ticking exercise.
3. Because I have valuable experience to share with others – I’ve had an amazing life, it’s not, and never has been doom and gloom. I was born into a situation, but it has NOT moulded me, I threw the mould against the wall and chucked it down the stairs. Not to sound all Kanye, but I truly believe have something to give, and I believe the situations I’ve come across, and have overcome have made me a strong person, and a person with a story to tell. My story IS NOT about disability, it’s about working hard, it’s about business, it’s about caring about people, it’s about seeing the world, it’s about falling in love, it’s about learning lessons, it’s about being a normal bloody wreck of a person! I’ve got so much to share, and so much to teach people. I represent so many people, and I want to represent more! I’m not perfect, and that is good. I want to teach people that ANYTHING is obtainable.
that leads me nicely to..
4. ANYTHING is Obtainable – I always say my motto is YOLO (a.k.a the modern day Carpe Diem!) Literally, we need to stop being scared of failing. Work your ass off and SOMEONE out there will take a chance on you. I guess I’m just waiting on my Media industry prince/princess/king/queen/joker charming.
So that’s it, in a proverbial nutshell. I want to, I can, and I will. So.. I’ll see you on the flipside.